Snowboards and Microphones
by cappychan
Summary: "Chouji. Don't be stupid. There's no way in hell that I, a not famous snowboarder, from Konohagakure can go out with super famous teen pop sensation, Temari from Sunagakure. Th-things just don't work that way, man. You know it." AU ShikaTema
1. Prologue

**AN: **holy shit, so many stories =A= this story is AU 'cause AU is awesome! shikatema, nejiten, naruhina, inochou, & sasusaku. i just love this idea. this story will come along _really _slowly since i have like twenty billion other stories to update. so yeah. i know shika's supposed to be lazy and not really do anything, but i think snowboarding is pretty beastin' (even though i do not know how to xD) so yeah. so i hope you guys like this :D shika's POV ooc my fault, and i apologize. i don't know how people practice snowboarding =A= i just know they do because my friend is a huge snowboarder so yeah... i need a better title. anyone care to help gaar out? all suggestions are appreciated

**Summary: **"Chouji. Don't be stupid. There's no way in _hell _that I, a not famous snowboarder, from Konohagakure can go out with super famous teen pop sensation, Temari from Sunagakure. Th-things just don't work that way, man. You know it."

_Disclaimer: Naruto doesn't belong to me. If it did... Gaara would have bows in his hair..._

_Gaara: What?  
__Me: ... oA o admit it, you would look adorable  
__Gaara: No I wouldn't.  
__Me: Yes you would.  
__Naruto: You guys, get a room. Anyways, Naruto doesn't belong to Gaar-chan, it belongs to Masashi Kishimoto-san, dattebayo!  
__Gaara: 'Gaar-chan'?  
__Me: My nickname came from you~!  
__Gaara: You're a typical fangirl  
Me: Nuh uh!  
Gaara: Yuh huh  
__Naruto: GET A ROOM!_

_

* * *

_**Prologue**

_enjoy~!_

* * *

This. Is. A. Drag. I don't even know why we let Ino and Sakura drive us to practice. They kept talking about that new singer, Temari. They were squealing and screaming while Ino tried to focus on the road. _Tried _being the keyword. Naruto was sitting on my right, playing with his goggles, Sasuke on my left staring out the window, Neji sitting in front of Naruto with his arms crossed and eyes closed while Chouji sat in the middle, munching loudly on another bag of chips. Tenten sat next to him and Hinata was squished with her. Why did all the girls have to come? I mean, it's out practice. Our as in me, Naruto, Sasuke, Neji and Chouji. Why are there girls you ask? Well, Sakura and Sasuke are going out, Naruto and Hinata's two year anniversary is coming up, Tenten and Neji are meant to be and Ino and Chouji are crazy for each other. And me? Me? I have no girlfriend. I don't want one either. They're such a drag.

"Shika, what's with the long face?" Ino asked, looking in the rear-view mirror at me as I frowned. I hate it when people call me that. "It's Shika-_maru. _Shika-_maru." _I said emphasizing the _'Maru'. _She giggled and I scowled. Women are such a drag. And troublesome. A troublesome drag. Naruto reached out to pat my shoulder, his goofy grin on his face. Naruto was weird. I mean what kid has a tattoo of whiskers? But I never really say stuff like that in his face. Naruto doesn't have any parents nor relatives, but he hangs out at our houses every now and then. Sasuke has no parents either, but he does have a brother. However, they don't get a long very well so Sasuke lives alone or chills at Sakura's place. Neji and Hinata's family are super rich and don't really like other people. They're super full of themselves; well Neji is at least.

Ino and Sakura are the best of friends and not much is known about Tenten. Chouji is my best friend and he's just a normal kid like me. We're all normal kids. Sort of. Naruto pulled his bandanna off his neck and stuffed it into his pocket, fixing his goggles. You guys might be thinking where we're going right now. Snowboarding practice. Laugh all you want, but it's our lives. We're one of the best teams in Konohagakure and we're only five guys. Normal teams have like eight dudes on one team, but us, heh, we're fine with five guys. Ino came to a stop, all of our faces meeting the seat in front of us. "Nice driving." Naruto muttered as he rubbed his head. We practice everyday after school and all day on the weekends. Today was Friday and that meant we can stay all we want.

Ino's third cousin's girlfriend's sister's husband's dad's brother's son owns the place and let's Ino stay even though they don't know each other that well. Don't ask me. Ino has a large family. Hinata opened the door and was on the floor when Tenten pushed her out, Chouji helping them both up. Ino got out of the driver's seat and screamed, then Sakura screamed. I looked at where they were pointing and wanted to die. "Oh my God! That's Temari's newest poster! It looks so great!" Both Sakura and Ino squealed, hopping in place. The poster wasn't even that great. I mean, what girl has four pigtails? She wore a spaghetti strap shirt with lace at the end, holding the microphone to her glossy lips, staring at the people -well actually the camera that took the picture- with her free hand outstretched to take the fans.

Sakura screamed once more, reading what it said at the bottom as we opened the trunk, taking out our snowboards. "Ino! It says she's coming here!" Ino pushed Sakura out of the way and into the snow, reading what she had just said. "AH! NO WAY!" Ino squealed as Sakura nodded her head. Here we go. Naruto handed me my board; it was green on the bottom, a bunch of guy stuff on it -skulls, guns, y'know, that stuff- and took out his own. Sasuke tossed Chouji his and Neji took out his own. Neji had the simplest board out of all of us; it was just the Yin and Yang sign. Bor-ing. Sakura and Ino informed us that they were staying at the lodge and he just waved them good bye. Well I did.

Sasuke was grabbed by Sakura and kissed repeatedly, Naruto kissed Hinata's forehead, Neji and Tenten playfully punching each other before kissing, and Chouji and Ino were just at it. I 'ahem-ed' and the four couples pulled away from each other, blushing. I sighed loudly; I came to snowboard not watch my friends make-out with each other. I started up the hill by myself, holding my snowboard by my side. Sometimes, I wished I did have a girlfriend. I'm like the black sheep in the group. And sometimes I wish I didn't have a girlfriend. I heard somebody follow me up the hill and fall. I kinda guessed who it was.

"Hey, brah, you gotta wait up for us!" Naruto called as he brushed snow off his face. You call girls 'brah'. I turned around, seeing Naruto pick up his snowboard and jog up the hill. "You call chicks 'brah', Naruto. You call dudes 'bro'." I stated as he shook his head. "Nuh uh, brah. You can call anyone 'brah'!" He said as a matter of fact. I rolled my eyes. There was no point in arguing with Naruto. He always thought up ways to win the argument; stupid antics and dumb words. I swear sometimes, Naruto only wants to be right. Sasuke had his hands in his pockets with Neji following behind Chouji. Neji and Sasuke didn't really along. Hell, what am I talking about? He and Naruto _hate _each other. We finally made it to the ski lift, Chouji and Neji sitting together while Naruto bickered with Sasuke. I sat by myself with my board next to me. My ski left rocked in the wind, my legs swinging.

Naruto wore a helmet when he snowboards. It's funny. It's bright yellow and you can see it zooming down the mountain. I don't wear a helmet. I wear a hat like normal people. Naruto says if he doesn't wear a helmet, he'll get stupider. And I quote his words. Amen, Naruto. We got off the ski lift and looked at each other. Truth be told, we could all find each other in an avalanche. I mean, Chouji wears a bright green flak jacket. Sasuke is dressed head-to-toe in black. Neji was dressed in gray with a brown bandanna. Must I mention Naruto's hideously bright yellow helmet? And me, dressed in bright green and brown. And we all wore bandannas. I mean, if there was another team of five dudes -which I think can never happen- wearing the same thing, we have our bandannas with our initials on them. The letters are huge and bright, so they aren't that hard to spot.

Naruto put on his goggles, tied his bandanna, then strapped on his helmet. I almost laughed at how funny he looked. I fixed my own goggles and tightened my bandanna, repositioning my hat as well as the others. We took one look at each other then we sped down the steep hill.

* * *

Three hours later and we were down to our thermals. Naruto met me at the bottom, falling over from the impact. He started laughing as I smiled weakly, sitting down next to him. He took his helmet off and goggles, ripping the bandanna off his red face. "Dude, when I was going down the black diamond, I got a text from Ino and Sakura." He informed me as I furrowed my brow. Chouji came down after, tackling both of us as Neji came to a stop, pelting our faces with snow. "Shit, Neji!" Naruto exclaimed, spitting snow and rubbing his face. I stood up, helping the others up when we heard Sasuke call. "Oh shit." We all said as he rammed into us.

"Nice guys." Sasuke muttered, all of our limbs tangled together. I sighed, pushing myself away from the other four dudes painfully. Once untangled, Naruto pulled out his phone, all of us huddling over him. The text read:

**To: **naruto  
**From: **Ino  
**Message: **OMFG YOU GUYS WILL NOT BELIEVE THIS!  
MY DAD GOT US FRONT ROW TICKETS TO TEMARI'S  
CONCERT! AND BACKSTAGE PASSES! AAAAAAH!

Oh no. Naruto grinned at all of us, saying how much fun this would be. Yeah fun for them. Did I ever mention Ino's dad owns the chain of theatres all over Konohagakure?

* * *

**AN: **okay this was the first chapter :D how do you guys like it? continue or not? reviews reviews reviews! i need reviews to patch up the holes in my house D; oh and that 'brah' incident actually happened with me and my friend. he's a total skater and he snowboards so he has that funny accent. and we were fighting over whether or not you call chicks 'brah' or dudes 'brah' so he just started calling everyone 'brah'. and that helmet part of the story xD my same friend wears a yellow helmet... i think xD it's really funny. so anyways, i'm rambling. continue or no?


	2. Whoa Oh Me Vs Everyone

**AN: **okay. i'm procrastinating again. since no one said anything about the title, i decided to think up an idea (with a bit of my mother's creativity) i came up with a new title: Snowy Lullabies. tell me what you think. chapters won't be long, because... well because i like to keep things short- the more chapters, the merrier! :) they'll be like one thousand words, give or take my lack of creativity and writer's block so yeah. dude, reiko appears in all of my naruto stories xD sorry about that. lol try your hardest to enjoy this chapter, my sweets, oh and the first chapter was actually a prologue but my stupidity forgot to say that =A= how do you guys like the idea of my naming chapter after real songs? i think it's creative, so i will. each song will actually flow very freely with the chapter so yeah. basically, in some parts of the lyrics (like in Whoa Oh (Me Vs Everyone)) Shika is pressured by everyone to go. if you read the lyrics you can match a few concepts in this chapter with the lyrics. anywho, enjoy~

I DON'T OWN ANY SONG TITLES USED IN THIS STORY!

* * *

**Whoa Oh (Me Vs. Everyone)  
**_Forever the Sickest Kids_

_If I owned Naruto, Hinata would grow a backbone and tell Naruto how she feels about him_

_

* * *

_Ino took my loud groans and long explanation as a 'yes'. I didn't want to go to Temari's concert. I don't like her at all. First of all, she probably lip syncs her songs. Secondly, she probably doesn't really look like that. Thirdly, she doesn't even write her own songs like she 'claims'. Fourthly, she is just like any other stage girl. Fifthly, _everybody _loves her and I'm not the type to be in the 'crowd'. Lastly, she tries way to hard.

"So, Shika! The concert is a week from tomorrow! Sakura and I will pick you up at five! Okay?" Ino confirmed once more. I sighed loudly; I had no choice. They would hold this against my forever if I didn't go. I nodded, "Yeah whatever." Ino squealing as she hugged me. "This is going to be so much fun!" She said as she and Sakura both screamed about nonsense. I rolled my eyes, crossing my arms. Snowboard practice ended a long time ago, and now we were just chilling at Ino's huge house. Her family's rich. Not as rich as Neji and Hinata though; no one could be as rich as them.

That concert was not going to be fun. Remember what I said about my being the only one without a girlfriend? Yeah, I'm a ninth wheel for God's sake. Naruto turned on the radio, slurping the rest of his ramen as he fished a station. He came across his favorite station; 130.9 GKWS. Lucky us, Temari's hit single _Social Barricade _was playing_. _It was a song about socially awkward kids, that Temari wrote herself. I sighed aloud, closing my eyes, listening to the lyrics that I wished weren't playing.

_"In a world filled with hate  
all we can do is wait  
wait and see  
what those deny and flee  
will become the bizarre  
that will heal this scar  
in this ragged, child's play  
into sophisticated and at bay  
__place where no one will pray  
for such a calm day."_

There was no way a chick like her could write something like that. I mean, look at her. She's tall, blonde, eighteen, a stage figure; could you believe that? Bull shit. Sakura and Ino began singing along to the song -which was worst than the original- while Sasuke read a book on the sofa. Naruto played with Hinata's hair while she sat in between his legs, Chouji watching a gruesome movie while he munched on his hundredth bag of chips. Tenten and Neji laid beside each other, watching the movie loosely as they talked. I laid on the other sofa with my eyes closed, counting the imaginary clouds that were etched in my eyelids.

"_There's nothing in the world  
that can be unfurled  
by the distractions  
of insecure actions  
crazed and delicate  
ones with a special fate  
that burned monstrosity  
snarls with such ferocity  
can calm those with a serenade  
in this social barricade."_

The song ended with the guitar finishing it's riff, Temari's echoing words booming in the speakers. "What a great concept." Tenten said, rolling onto her back as the others agreed. 'Great concept' my ass. It's just another song. From Temari. She has like sixteen songs already. And she was only announced three weeks ago. Her first album, 'Colorful Scenarios', topped the chart and beat Singeing Sonata that held number one for six weeks. Her second album, 'Windy Whispers' beat her first one.

'Social Barricade' came in as number two on the top one hundreds, while her other song, 'Etching Beauty' was first. I thought it wasn't possible the same artist can take both positions. Temari had collaborated with another hit band, Pacifying Perils and they made it to number four. Everyone says she's amazing, prodigal, one of a kind. Psh, yeah right. I mean, any blonde chick can get up on stage in a pair of white skinny jeans and a purple tank top and sing like her. Except for Ino. She's my friend, but she's not the greatest singer in the world.

* * *

I was asleep at five on the day of the concert, genuinely unaware of Ino's eighteen calls and thirty-six text messages. She called my house three times too, and that was when my mother was fed up. She came down the stairs while I snored lightly, a comic book over my eyes -hey, it's a pretty good series- and shook my shoulder gently, the house phone in her free hand. "Shikamaru honey. Shikamaru." She whispered, groaning when I didn't wake up.

"Shikamaru! Wake up this instant!" She yelled, shaking my shoulder vigorously when I finally came to. "What? Wha? M-Mom!" I yawned, stretching as she handed the phone to me. "It's Ino." She informed as I sighed, bringing the phone to my ears. "Hello?" I asked, looking at the clock. Shit. It was five.

"SHIKA! Where were you? I called like a billion times! Why didn't you pick up! The concert starts in less than ten minutes and you live twenty minutes away! How are we going to drive to your house and then go to the concert?" She rambled when I groaned. "Ino, wait a minute. The concert doesn't start at five. At five, they're lines for people who are waiting to get in. At five fifteen, they are situating people. At five thirty, is when I concert starts." I reassured her as she threatened me to be right. I sighed telling her I'll be outside.

In less than six minutes, Ino was here with Sakura in the passenger seat, Naruto, Neji, Hinata, and Tenten squished in the far back. Sasuke and Chouji sat in the middle row of seats, including myself. I crawled in, feeling the heat blast me in the face. The radio was on again on the same station -it's like all of our favorites- 130.9 GKWS playing Temari's _Vivid Twilight_. The dude narrating the radio informed all of the listeners that that was one of the many songs Temari was going to play. The others were, of course: Social Barricade, Etching Beauty, Sinful Sarcasm, Plain, Hero Hero, Duct Tape to the Lips, Filthy Beast, Modern Day Attacks featuring Pacifying Perils, Colorful Scenarios, and Fake Fake Faker. Each song was about three minutes except for Modern Day Attacks, that was five minutes.

Temari was lead act in the whole concert. The other bands that were playing was Pacifying Perils -they needed to be there to sing Modern Day Attacks-, Liquid Black, and Purple Folder. They were all bands from Sunagakure and super huge there. Here? In Konohagakura? Not that much. The big bands here are Lying Silence, Patch !t Up, Sugar Maple -an all girl group- and 77.9 Effect. And of course Temari; but she's a hit everywhere. The drive was long and boring; we were stuck in traffic. Ino cursed loudly, looking around when she found a detour, driving that way.

"Uh, Ino. Are you sure we can go this way?" Naruto worried, looking around. "Don't worry. My dad owns the theatre, so we'll be fine." She said, coming into the parking lot. This place was packed. The DJ said that the tickets were sold out within a day. Damn, these people really want to see this chick. Ino parked in the back of the large theatre, stopping in front of a door with a large, burly dude standing in front of it like it was a private club. She got out along with the rest of us, following her as Ino looked for her wallet. When she found it in her huge purse, she showed the man the card she carried with her and we were in. Some times, it was great that Ino's dad owned the chain of theatres. We cut through a few lines, showing the chick with blue highlights our tickets and she gave us those band thingies as well as back stage passes.

"Oh! I can't believe we're going to meet Temari!" Ino and Sakura squealed, entering the theatre from the back. We got a glimpse of Liquid Black and Purple Folder. Ino screamed when she saw Temari's back so Chouji made her be quiet. We got our front row seats and sat there for ages. The lights dimmed and that's when I became the luckiest guy there. Well, that's what my friends thought.

* * *

**AN: **ooooh~! cliffhanger! how did you guys like it? i hope you did. sorry if it's shitty. and those lyrics, i came up with them myself so if they don't make sense then that's too bad. ;D


	3. Coffee Break

**AN: **how sexy do you think gaara would be as a guitarist? yeah, that's right, _really _sexy. really you guys, i'm flattered that you like the story, but I want to know if you guys like the title or not D; please, _please _tell me if you want it changed or not. i can't stress that enough =A= so yeah, read along.

* * *

**Coffee Break  
**_Forever the Sickest Kids_

_If I owned Naruto, Reiko would be a real character._

* * *

I stood there, feeling really stuffy in this theatre. I looked around to see a bunch of dudes and chicks, but mostly dudes. Rolling my eyes slightly, I turned my attention to the dimmed stage, lights strobing the stage. The lights finally stopped messing with our heads and landed on who I supposed was Temari, dressed in a really -I had to admit- hot outfit. She was like a business woman, except, with more flare. A lot more hot flare. On her far right was this red-headed guy -and I mean red- with a bright red Fender Stratocaster, in a bright ass red suit too. This kid was weird; first, he had the word 'Love' in Kanji on his forehead, and has no eyebrows... He's weird, but not as weird of the drummer. He wore a bright purple suit and looked pretty normal with his brunette hair but when I looked at his face, I had to make sure I wasn't imagining shit. He had purple make-up on. What's up with her band? The back-up guitarist was in a bright blue suit and had a same color Telecaster. The bassist wore a bright green suit and just had a standard fret-less bass.

The first three bands already played, getting not that much attention as Temari was getting right now. I mean, she hasn't even started singing and they were screaming. The weirdo with red hair started playing the riff to _Hero, Hero _and that's when everyone went wild. I looked to my side and saw that Ino and Sakura were screaming like everyone else. Sasuke, Neji and Naruto just stood there and listened while Tenten, Hinata, and Chouji talked, smiling pleasantly. I stood there, arms crossed and scowling, the lyrics entering my eardrums.

_"So why, why, why did you have to go and play hero, hero?  
Saying, saying that you didn't want to go on, on, on!  
Were you scared that you were gonna hit zero, zero?  
Don't, don't, don't think you're gonna be so soon gone!  
Keep on, keep on saying that you're mine,  
or things won't, won't, won't be fine!"_

The lyrics stopped for a guitar solo, everyone jamming out. Even Naruto was there banging his head. Man, these people are die-hard Temari fans. I sighed loudly, suddenly blinded by the Goddamn light. I looked up at the stage to see Temari pointing at me, Sakura and Ino gasping and everyone staring at me. I continued to frown as Temari smiled, continuing her song. I rolled my eyes, getting scold by Ino and Sakura about shit I could care less about. Sighing, I tried to ignore the next billion songs she sang.

* * *

"OH MY GOD! WE'RE GOING TO MEET TEMARI!" Ino and Sakura both screamed, Chouji and Sasuke trying to calm them down. I saw the red-haired guitarist on the phone, the drummer handing Temari a coffee. Ino and Sakura squealed, hopping in one place as they began a conversation with her. I turned to Tenten and Hinata who stood next to Neji and Naruto. "Aren't you guys gonna talk to her?" All four of them shrugged as I sighed, somebody walking towards me. Suddenly, Temari looked at me, head to toe before frowning. "You're the guy that frowned when the lights hit you." She stated, crossing her arms. I scowled, "Yeah, what of it?" I asked as she scoffed. "You should be happy the lights hit you." She said turning to the side. I rolled my eyes, putting my hands in my pocket. "Happy? I didn't even want to come." Ino and Sakura gasped this time as Temari raised an eyebrow. She turned to the freak with purple make-up and nodded at him while he pulled out a piece of paper and wrote something on it. He handed to her while she folded it in half, stuffing it into my opened chest pocket.

"Meet me here tomorrow." She said before walking away. Everyone stared wide-eyed, even Neji and Sasuke were surprised. Chouji came towards me, his mouth as big as his eyes. "Dude! Take the piece of paper out, man! What's it say?" He asked as I did as so lazily, looking at the piece of paper. It read _Café Latté two thirty. 987-289-5586 _Chouji ripped the piece of paper from my hand, reading it over. "Holy shit, dude! you have Temari's number!" He exclaimed as the rest of our gang crowded. "REALLY?" Ino and Sakura screamed simultaneously, trying to get the piece of paper from Chouji. As he dodged their feeble attacks, I took the piece of paper from him when he turned his back, stuffing it into my pocket.

"Are you really going to go?" They all asked as I shrugged. Chouji, Ino, and Sakura gaped, "Well if you aren't give me the number!" Ino said as Sakura glared. "No, give me the number!" She said as Ino scowled. Chouji rolled his eyes, looking at me. "Bro, we both know you'll give me the number." He said with a satisfied look in his eye. I shook my head, walking away. As much as I don't like Temari, I wasn't going to let my friends bug her twenty-four-seven. That's how generous I was.

The next day, I was trying to sleep but my mom kept nagging at me. I looked at the clock and it read one forty-five. Damn it. I sat up, grabbed my car keys and went out the door. My mom opened the door and asked where I was going, "Out." I replied simply, climbing into my car. She groaned, slammed the door shut and probably went to bug my dad. My car wasn't special; just green and smelled of cigarettes. Speaking of cigarettes, I dug in the back and found an almost empty pack. I pulled out the lonely cigarette and popped it into my mouth, lighting the end. With the key in the ignition, and I was gone.

Café Latté wasn't that far from my house. I stopped at a street, failing at my parallel parking and got out of the car. I sucked in the smoke once more, letting it sit in my mouth before exhaling loudly, dropping the cigarette onto the floor and stomping it out. My phone began ringing, getting a call from Ino. I ignored it and started across the street. My phone began ringing, getting a call from Sakura. I ignored it and started on the sidewalk. My phone began ringing, getting a call from Chouji. I ignored it and continued down the street. My phone began ringing, getting a call from... my mom? I ignored it and turned my phone off, standing outside of the cafe.

I looked at the watch I wore. Two thirty. I sighed; I didn't even want to be here. But, it was either go have some coffee, tea or whatever with Temari, or get yelled at by my mom. You would chose the obvious, right? I dunno how long I was waiting, but this black car drove up against the sidewalk and the familiar red-head popped out from the passenger's seat. The guy with weird purple makeup came from the back and Temari came from the driver's seat. Without her two freaks I don't think I could've recognized her. She wore a pair of large sunglasses and a hat, with a skirt and a pair of knee high boots.

She grinned at me as I rolled my eyes. Whoa. The red-head wears eyeliner. What the hell. She came up to me and pulled off her sunglasses, "I thought you weren't going to come." Temari said. I shrugged, "Yeah, well. I didn't want to be at home and have my mom nag at me." She chuckled and we all entered. The perky waitress greeted us and asked if we wanted to sit in the back where people are allowed to smoke or in the front. Temari opened her mouth to speak, "In the back." I interjected, Temari turning to raise an eyebrow.

"Why in the back?" The brunette with makeup on asked. I sighed, continuing down the halls and sat down where the waitress offered. They all sat down around the table, my fingers fumbling for the pack of cigarettes. I lit it up and inhaled. "So, why am I here?"

* * *

**AN: **i love leaving you guys with a cliffhanger :D anyways, REVIEW! RIGHT NOW! IT ISN'T HARD!


	4. Teenagers

**AN: **sorry for such a long wait. i thought i already updated this! but turns out, i was so stupid and deleted it on accident. =A= so just a few oopsies i made; i'm not actually gonna each chapter after a song that ties in with the chapter, just whatever comes to mind and what i think is good. reiko has to make an appearance in all my naruto stories! :D anyways, i'm rambling. enjoy~!

* * *

**Teenagers  
**_My Chemical Romance_

_If I owned Naruto, ShikaTema would be Canoned._

* * *

The four of us stared at each other for a second, my cigarette going out. Temari had a 'thinking look' plastered to her face when she shrugged. "Fan service." Psh, who does she think I am? I laughed sarcastically and mushed the cigarette into the ashtray. "Do I look like a fan?" I asked, when she stared at me once more. "No, not really." An awkward silence came over the four of us when I looked at the red head and the brunette. Really. Why did they look like that? Some questions could never be answered. Or so I thought.

"Isn't anyone going to come and take our orders?" Temari asked when the red-head and I said 'no' at the same time. We looked at each other for a second before he stood up, "You have to order at the counter." Temari nodded, crossing her legs. We all looked at each other once more before he asked what we wanted. "A iced French roast with vanilla creamer and a slice of raspberry cheesecake." I answered quickly while Temari looked over the menu. "An iced tea with a slice of apple pie, please." We all looked at the brunette who shook his head. "Just a glass of water." What a plain dude.

The red-head nodded and was gone. The other guy got up and walked to the bathroom, leaving me alone with teen pop sensation, Temari. "Who are those two dudes?" I finally asked. I needed to know who they were. How many times in your life do you see a red-headed dude with no eyebrows and emo eyes? Yeah that's right, _never. _I guess I'm just lucky. Temari shrugged again, "Gaara— the red-headed one— is my guitarist, and producer. While Kankuro is my bodyguard and managed. Both of them are my brothers, too." Wait...

"What the fuck?" Seriously... can one person be so many things? That's wicked crazy. Temari raised an eyebrow, crossing her legs again with her palms over her knees.

"Excuse me?" She asked, pure curiosity in her eyes. Seriously man, I swear no one asks her this question.

"How can one dude be like three things at once?" She shrugged again, watching Kankuro take his seat right next to her, eyes glued to his phone's screen. I can tell why _he's _the bodyguard, and not the other guy. "Well, what about the... other one. How is he a producer? He's like my age."

"Younger. Gaara's sixteen. And he took our dad's role as owner of Kazekage Records, just like whatever her name owns Hokage records." Right, that makes more sense. Tsunade is the newest owner of Hokage Records. She brings up _everything_; video games, movies, music, you name it. Naruto wants to be the next owner. You don't have to be related to the previous owner, you just gotta be picked by the _previous _owner. It seems like a bunch of troublesome work to me.

The awkward silence came onto us again, only the buzz of Kankuro's phone. "So why here?" I asked, leaning back into my chair. She furrowed her brow when I sighed, slouching slightly. "They're a number of great, high-class cafes in Konohagakure, but why did you pick this one?" She shrugged; man I could tell she loved doing that. "Gaara got me my coffee here the other day, and he recommended it." I turned to the side and looked at the counter, seeing Gaara and this one chick just fighting. Or flirting. After a moment, she wrote something down and handed it to him, as well as a plate with our stuff on it. I see Mister Big Shot has a date. My phone started ringing _just _when Gaara sat down with our stuff, handing it out to all of us. They all stared at me; maybe 'cause of my ringtone. My ringtone was 77.9 Effect's _Chill. _Naruto was calling. Oh jeez.

"Sup."

"Dude! Where are you? Practice started over an hour ago."

Shit. Practice.

"I'm with Temari."

"WITH TEMARI?"

I heard a wave of cries on the other side of the line, having to pull the phone away from ear.

"Yeah. I'll be there in a sec, dude, just chill."

"Fine, fine. But you better be here in less than half an hour. 'Else coach's gonna kick yo ass."

There was another wave of 'ooo's'. Really? Coach? Coach didn't give a shit about what we did. Why is coach gonna be there now?

"Yeah, whatever."

"Oh, an', get Hina-hima and I an autograph from Temari, brah."

"Yeah okay."

Naruto was silent for a second before I heard the cries of torture and the wails of inflicting pain. I hung up after that.

"Who was it?" The three of them asked. I shook my head, asking the waitress if she could pack my stuff up. "Could you sign an autograph for my friend, Naruto and his girlfriend, Hinata?" Temari nodded slowly and signed quickly on the paper, handing it to me as I nodded my head. "Alright, I got to go now." I announced, taking and thanking as the waitress handed me my bag. "Where are you going?" Temari asked, standing up herself, throwing down a fifty for a tip. Holy shit, man. "Snowboard practice." I answered bluntly. That was the worst mistake of my life.

"I'm coming too." Temari decided herself, turning to Gaara, asking him to order her a snowboard. She had this crazy look in her eye that said I couldn't say shit. Fuck, what did I get myself into? I hope she knows what she's in for if she's gonna come with me... and meet my friends and Coach.


	5. Girls Do What They Want

**AN: **hmm yes, i've been gone FOREVER and I apologize. I'm starting high school this coming fall and I'm kind of nervous, but guess what? IT'S SUMMER VACATION. That's right, I can write ALL SUMMER. So yeah. Sorry for keeping you guys hanging. There were so many errors in the last chapter haha. I'll try to catch them in this one. Anyways, enjoy (: PS. it's not the best chapter, but it's something c:

* * *

**Girls Do What They Want**

_The Maine_

_If I owned Naruto, NaruHina would be Canoned. _

* * *

Yeah, so Temari rode her super fancy limo while I had to drive myself. My stuff was all ready in the back, so that made my life a little bit better... sort of. I honestly don't know _why _she wanted to tag along. With me of all people in the world too. Isn't she touring worldwide? Why is she still here? Why the _fuck _am I asking myself these questions?

A small sheet of snow was falling to earth when we arrived at the Ino's... relative's place. Me and the guys come _after _hours so no one can bug us, which is super nice of Ino's third cousin's girlfriend's sister's husband's dad's brother's son. I saw Neji go down the small hill and the gang all piled up in front of the chalet. Oh God. And there was Coach. He was a weird bro. I honestly don't understand why he _snowboards. _He's got that 'old, pedophile creepy guy' look and I sometimes wonder why girls always ask him out.

Coach stood there with his long white hair and awkward tattoos, arms crossed and cliché tapping-foot. I climbed out of my old car with Temari and her crew right behind. "Hey Coach." I greeted with my lips set in a straight, thin line. "Don't you 'Hey Coach' me, Nara! Where have you been?" Coach yelled, fists on his hips. I flinched. _Hanging out with Temari, y'know the usual. _I bit my tongue and looked at the guys for a little help but they all rolled their eyes.

"Uhh, I was out with... Temari..." Coach's eyes widened as he turned to see Temari right beside me now. "_The _Temari?" I nodded, the gang coming up behind Coach. Naruto grinned while Neji looked surprise. Yeah, I'm the shit and you're all jealous. I shook my head slightly, silently laughing at my own cockiness. Coach was stilled gaping, an envious look in his eyes as he stared.

"Yeah, it's pretty amazing. Come on let's go now. We're not gonna stand here til the snow melts." I said, taking out my board and shit. Temari rolled her eyes and talked to Gaara, her board just arriving. God I hate rich people. This time I rolled _my _eyes and put on my jacket whilst tying my bandanna. "Hey princess of everything, you know how to ride?" I asked, adjusting my goggles.

Temari glared and put on her own jacket, which was neon purple and hurt my eyes like shit. "In my free time, me and the guys sand board. Which is the same thing as snowboarding but in sand." She stated like it was a known fact. It probably was a known fact to her _fans_. Naruto cheered and grabbed his board, daring everyone to race him to the ski lift. Now I had someone to ride with. Woopty doo.

So we got onto the ski lift, in same formation – Neji and Chouji, Naruto and Sasuke, and Me... and now Temari –, and it was quiet. Not even Naurto and Sasuke were fighting. They kept turning around to look at me and Temari and it was super awkward. I don't see what's so special about Temari; I mean she's just a girl... who's super famous.

Temari decided to be the man and break the awkward ice. "What's your Coach's name?" I stared at her for a second, thinking. I never really thought about Coach's name. I think he told us when he became our coach... but that was over three years ago. "I... I think his name is Jiraiya." I said hesitantly, thinking it was right. Yeah it sounded right to me. She looked at me like I was crazy for a second before shaking her head. "What?" I asked sharply, getting off of the ski lift. "Nothing." Temari replied blandly. Gosh, girls these days. "Whatever."

I strayed away from the guys and went the longer way down the mountain. I liked being by myself when going down things this steep; it was just more fun and made me feel reckless. When I thought I was completely alone, I was wrong. I heard somebody shredding behind me, and can you guess who it was? Yep, that's right, Temari. She shreds like a bro, it's crazy.

So being as awesome as I am, I decided to show off, seeing a small jump near the end of the hill. Just as I was gonna board off of the jump, a hand shoved me to the ground and all I saw was that hideously, obnoxious, purple jacket blaze into the air. "Fuck." I said loudly, trying to get back up. It's all right that my face was frozen, and my hair a little wet from the snow, but no girl can kick me where it hurts most... in my _pride. _I boarded down the hill, taking my time and when I got to the bottom, I saw Ino and Sakura harassing Temari. That's what she gets for thinking she's better than I am.

I was carrying my board when I met up the with gang, Ino and Sakura red in the face from screaming. "DO YOU SEE THIS? TEMARI IS HERE. RIGHT NOW. WITH US!" They both screamed, my eyes rolling by themselves. "Yeah. I see. I brought her here." They screamed again. I still don't understand why she's so amazing. I might have mentioned that a million times already. But, seriously! What is so great about her? Yeah, she might be talented, famous, rich... and dare I say _beautiful, _but she's an average chick like anyone else... right? Whatever, I guess girls just do what they want.


	6. Just The Way I'm Not

**Just the Way I'm Not**

_All Time Low_

_If I owned Naruto, Gaara would dance around in booty shorts in his office. _

* * *

Sakura and Ino screamed and screamed and _screamed. _I swear, my ears should have burst a long time ago. This is another reason why I don't have a girlfriend; they're so troublesome sometimes. Chouji pulled me aside, Coach just drooling beneath Temari. "Bro, this is pretty rad. I mean, you and Temari–" Wait what?

"What are you talking about?" I cut in, my eyes showing confusion. Whenever, at school, someone is talking about two people being a... y'know, couple? They _always _say, 'name and name'. Does Chouji think me and Temari... are... going out? What? "I'm _talking _about YOU and TEMARI!"

God, can this kid yell any louder? I groaned, shoving Chouji as far away from the group as possible. Thank goodness no one heard. I would _never _hear the end of it if they found out I was 'dating', WHICH I'M NOT, Temari. "Chouji, Chouji, Chouji... I'm tempted to kill you," I began as he winced. I say a lot of things to Chouji, like how sometimes I wish we'd never met, how he's annoying sometimes, and other times, I just don't talk to him. He's my best bro, couldn't live with out him, but sometimes, I'd wish he'd SHUT UP.

"What gave you the slightest idea that Temari and I are going out? You know that I find girls _troublesome. _Why would I date her if I wasn't so 'girlfriend-crazy'?" I asked with my arms crossed. If there was any reason I got a girlfriend, it would probably mean I was high. Or drunk. Maybe both. Shaking that thought away, Chouji stared at me for a second. "Why _wouldn't _you guys go out? I mean, she asked you to meet up with her at a cafe, you asked her to come along to practice–"

"Actually, she came along on her own, I didn't ask anything," I interjected. Chouji rolled his eyes and kicked around in the snow. "_What_ever, that's not that point, man. The point is that you and Temari got a thing. I'll get Sakura, she'll tell you!" NOT SAKURA. She has this weird thing where she knows whether or not two people like each other. It happened with Naruto and Hinata... actually, that's a bad example. The _whole _school knew they liked each other.

I don't even like Temari as a singer, nonetheless as a person. I mean, she's all right, but there's just nothing I like about her. Not being a dick or anything, it's just, I don't think she'd ever _like _me.

"Do _not _bring Sakura into this. She can't keep her big mouth shut,"

"OH~HOHOHOHO so you guys _are _dating!"

"W-what? NO. I just meant that if you bring her over here to do her weird prediction thing, _everyone _is going to think, hear that? THINK, Temari and I are dating!"

"Oh," Chouji began, a sad look growing on his face. "Well, you never know, you guys _could _have a thing growing..." I shot him a dirty look. I wasn't going to get a girlfriend, especially of all _girls _in the world Temari!

"Yeah, no, I don't think anything, _anything _is gonna happen between us." That was the bloody, gruesome end of our troublesome conversation. With that, Chouji sighed and the both of us started walking back to the group. Temari just finished signing like fifty million autographs for _just _Sakura and Ino. I wonder what it's like to be a superstar. I'd like to be a professional snowboarder, but that's kind of hard. I actually dunno if I could handle the crazy fangirls, the paparazzi, going to all these weird places... yeah I wouldn't want to be a superstar.

"Wait, Temari? Aren't you touring... like the world or something like that?" I heard Naruto ask.

"Yeah, I am," Temari replied.

"Then why are you still in Konohagakure?"

"This place is huge, I've got to play at least six or seven concerts," She stated as a matter-of-fact. Naruto nodded and turned to talk to Hinata. "How long are you staying?" I blurted, my face contorting in idiocy. God, why do I do that?

"About a month," Temari answered my stupid question with a smile on her face. I don't even _care _about how long she stays! I let out a sigh, and stuffed my hands in my pockets. Sasuke checked the time on his watch and groaned, Sakura's face curling in dismay. "I've got to go. My therapist wants to have dinner with me and Itachi, I'll see you guys at school tomorrow." He muttered, grabbing his board. "Hey, can you give me a ride home?" Sakura asked, already following him to his car. I wonder what the answer's gonna be?

Like I said before, Sasuke and his brother don't get along really well. Our school counselor signed them up for couple therapy, since their parents are dead. Sasuke thinks Itachi killed them since he was driving the car his parents were in when they died. It's one huge, troublesome mess.

There's this thing, this perfect camaraderie, between the five of us, where if one guy leaves it means everyone leaves. No one snowboards by themselves. It's a solemn rule. Like an oath we make to each other.

"Aight, I'll see you guys tomorrow!" Naruto said driving off with Hinata in the passenger seat. Neji, Tenten, Ino and Chouji were going to the movies for a double date and left right after Sasuke, leaving me with Temari and crew. We all stood there awkwardly before I said, "Yeah... so I'll see you guys around... Gotta get home for dinner..." Temari nodded and I was off.

* * *

"Hey mom," I greeted my mother who was at the stove as I entered my warm house. I set my board down and kicked off my boots, faintly listening to the TV in the living room where my dad was sitting. "Hi, honey. How was your day? What did you do today?" She asked. I sucked in a deep breath; I needed a smoke. Noticing a weird pair of shoes on the rack, I picked up my board and leaned it against it's resting place by the stairs.

"Oh you know, hanging out with the guys. I went to Cafe Latte with Temari too and she followed me to practice," As I paused, there was a loud bang, followed by thundering foot falls down the stairs. Scared shitless, I leaped backwards seeing my cousin Hatsune. Fuck! I forgot she was staying for the week!

"DID YOU SAY TEMARI?" Who would've guessed she liked Temari as much as Ino and Sakura? I wiped my face with both of my hands, wrinkling my nose in annoyance. "Yes, Temari. The teen-pop sensation, I hung out with her today." Hatsune let out a sharp cry that made my dad run into the kitchen with a knife in his hand. Where did that come from?

"WHERE'S THE RAPIST?" He yelled, his eyes darting to random places. I wonder sometimes... "Dad! There's NO rapist. Put the knife down!" I said, watching as my dad handed the knife to my mom. "Okay, just making sure..." He muttered, walking back to the living room.

Rubbing my right eye with the palm of my hand, I sighed loudly. "Hatsune, don't make this situation any more difficult for me..." I begged to my cousin who was just a year younger than I was. She lived not so far from here, and her parents' go on constant business trips. Hatsune jumps from houses; sometimes its my house, sometimes it's our grandparents. I guess they had enough of her.

"No promises. How did you become friends with Temari?" She asked. There was this look of 'I'm-gonna-kill-you-if-you-don't-help-me-meet-her' in her eyes that made me kind of scared.

"We're not really friends..."

"Then how did you meet her?"

"That's kind of a long story..."

* * *

**AN: **I updated! :D okay, so the only reason I made another OC for this story is that Shikamaru can be bothered at home. Oh, and, I am going on vacation for eight days from the 18th to the 27th. So yeah. Please review! (: Any OOC my fault, I apologize and sorry if it's kind of boring.


	7. I'm Not Your Boyfriend Baby

**I'm Not Your Boyfriend Baby**

_3OH!3_

_If I owned Naruto, Naruto would have became Hokage in episode one. _

* * *

"Well I have time!" Hatsune said, flailing her arms as she followed me downstairs. The basement is my domain. I moved into the basement around the time when I started smoking, since my mom _hated _the smell. My dad didn't really mind but he's totally whipped so he told me to quit and I proposed to live in the basement. They agreed reluctantly. Thank God too.

I pulled out a cigarette from its little box on my table and lit it. Hatsune jumped onto my bed and looked at me; she was waiting for me to elaborate. "For Christ's sake, Hatsune, is it that big of a deal?" That was probably the worst question I could ask. After uttering those words, Hatsune's eyes went blood shot and she tackled me to the floor. "Fuck!" I yelled because she was heavy and I hit my head. Grabbing my collar, Hatsune smelled like death. I sucked in a deep breath and tried to stay calm.

"YES IT IS A BIG DEAL!" She screamed in my face. Oh God. "O-okay! Okay! I'll tell you everything!" Her sweet smile reappeared onto her face and she climbed off of me. I stared horrified for a second before picking up the cigarette that fell out of my mouth. It was dirty. Tossing it away, I sighed loudly and lit another one, bringing it to my lips. Sitting on my bed anxiously, Hatsune watched closely as I pulled out a chair and sat as far away as I could from her.

"It all started when I was snowboarding with the guys, and Ino's dad got us tickets and back stage passes to meet Temari and shit like that. We went to troublesome concert, the spotlight hit me and she got pissy and wanted me to go with her to Café Latté and I guess we hung out. Then she followed me to practice and now I'm home, are you happy?"

Hatsune looked like she was going to die. I don't mean to sound harsh but I wished she did right about now. Screaming loudly again, I heard heavy footfalls coming down the basement steps. "NOTHING'S WRONG DAD!" I yelled. The footsteps turned around and my dad was gone. God, have mercy on my soul.

By the time I looked back at Hatsune, she was hyperventilating... or maybe choking. Whatever; she was just breathing funny. "DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS SHIKA?" I smacked my hand to my face; why does everyone think it's okay to call me that? I sighed very loudly and took a puff out of my cigarette. "What, what does it mean, Hatsune?" I asked monotonously. She giggled giddily and rocked back and forth on my bed. "It means you and Temari are DATING!" The cigarette in my mouth fell to the ground as I stared at my cousin, mortified. Not her too.

"Temari and I are NOT, not, not, _not _dating!" I said standing up from my seat. Just as I said that, my phone rang. Pulling it out of my pocket I checked who sent me a text and my face dropped.

"Who is it?" Hatsune asked.

"It's Temari..." I sighed. She pointed at me and bounced in her seat, screeching, "I knew it! I knew it!" I sighed loudly again and wiped my face with my hand. "We are _NOT _dating!" I yelled again. Stuffing my phone into my pocket, I sat back down. Just then, Hatsune grew silent and I knew shit was up. She made a scary looking face– which looked like a cross between a grin and a smirk– when I asked, "What's with that face?" whilst taking a step backwards.

"I think we should find out if Temari has a boyfriend," She said in a deathly voice, ghosting towards me. I swallowed the fear in my throat; nothing's more scary than a teenage girl after something she wants. Trust me, I've seen a lot of it. "Gimme the phone, Shika," Hatsune warned.

"Why do you even care if she has a boyfriend or not?" I asked, looking around the room for something to defend myself. My eyes shot to my paintball gun. I hope there was still some paint balls in there...

"It's not that I care if she has a boyfriend or not! If _my _cousin was going out with Temari, do you _know _what kind of benefits I could have?" She threw her skinny arms up into the air. "That's kind of selfish, don't you think?" I asked when she scoffed. "So? Anyone else would do it." I rolled my eyes. Fangirls.

Hopping off of the bed, Hatsune took a step towards me. "Hey, get away from me," I said, reaching for my paint ball gun. She gasped as I wrapped my hand around the neck. "Don't take another step forward, Hatsu, I'll shoot." I threatened. She snorted and smirked, "Yeah right!" Pointing the gun right next to her foot I pulled the trigger. A red paintball was sent flying to the ground a burst by Hatsune's foot while she screamed, "Shikamaru!" I grinned; thank God there was still some paint balls. "Just give me the Goddamn phone!" Hatsune shrieked running towards me.

"No!" I pulled the trigger again and nothing came out. "Shit, fuck," I muttered when Hatsune tackled me to the ground... again. "Get off of me!" I yelled, trying to push my cousin off of me.

"Hell! No! GIMME THE PHONE!"

"Fine! Fine" Just get off of me! And DON'T send anything stupid to her!" Hatsune grinned with success. I groaned and pulled out my phone, handing it to her. After getting off of me, I hunched over Hatsune and watched her closely.

**To: **Shikamaru

**From: **Temari

**Message: **Hey. I was wondering if you

and your friends wanted discounts to

my next show... Since your two friends

are kind of obsessed with me

**To: **Temari

**From: **Shikamaru

**Message: **Yeah, that'd be cool.

I don't mean to be creepy at all

but do you have a boyfriend?

I hit Hatsune in the back of the head just as she sent the message. "What the hell! I told you not to send anything stupid!" Hatsune shrugged, "Well that's too bad, it's already sent." I groaned when the phone rang. Oh God. She must think I'm a freak now.

**To: **Shikamaru

**From: **Temari

**Message: **Haha, that's an awkward question.

Are you hitting on me?

Oh my God. I grumbled and crossed my arms while Hatsune laughed. "She thinks you're hitting on her," I scowled. "Not funny. This is horrible, bro. This is the worst thing you could have done to me," I said seriously.

Hatsune put on a 'sad' face and patted my shoulder. "It's okay, Shika, I'm sure she doesn't think you're a freak," That didn't help at all. Checking my phone, there were no messages. "Look at this, she hasn't replied yet," Just then, the phone rang. For some odd reason, I really didn't want to see her reply. I wonder what this means.

* * *

**AN: **C: cliffhanger. Hope you don't hate me. Review puhlease (: oh and if anyone is into the anime/manga Ao No Exorcist, I'm gonna start writing one :D


	8. Won't Be Pathetic Forever

**Won't Be Pathetic Forever **

_The Wonder Years _

_If I owned Naruto, you'd know what Kakashi looks like. _

* * *

I held the phone in my hand for a really long time as I stared at Hatsune with death in my eyes. "I'm going to kill you," I said through my teeth while she took it offensively. "Sheesh, calm down, it's not like she's going to have a restraining order against you or something," Hatsune replied. You never know, Temari would pull something like that. I wonder how many restraining orders she's filed so far. What the fuck was I talking about.

"Oh god, I really don't want to open this message," I groaned aloud. Hatsune grinned at me and reached for my phone, "If you don't want to read it, I'll gladly read it for you!" she offered.

"No, get the fuck outta here, you've done enough damage,"

"At least let me read it,"

"I said no!"

"JUST READ THE FUCKING MESSAGE SHIKA! WHAT'S THE WORST THAT COULD BE IN THERE?" Hatsune yelled. I winced at that. She was right, what was I worrying about? Letting out a sigh, I shakily unlocked my phone and pulled up the message.

**To: **Shikamaru  
**From: **Temari  
**Message: **I'm just kidding with you haha. And no, I don't have a boyfriend at the moment,

Oh thank god. A wave of relief just swept over me when I read that and I don't even know why. Was I glad she didn't have a boyfriend? Why would I be glad about that? I could care less about this woman! Releasing a sigh, I typed a quick reply that just said 'okay' and that I was eating 'dinner'. Which was true, dinner would be ready any time now.

"Awh, that's no fun, Shika, why didn't you ask her out?" I shot Hatsune a glare.

"Are you kidding me? I don't even like her music, why would I want to date her?"

"Do you know how popular you would be if you dated her?" Hatsune said.

She had a point, but I wasn't the type of person that would use somebody. It just wasn't right. But, if I thought about it, I could kick off my snowboarder career through Temari... No, it still wasn't right. I wasn't that kind of person and I shouldn't be that kind of person. Besides, being in a relationship with Temari meant I had to be... ugh, _cute _with her and that wouldn't work at all.

"I do, but I'm not gonna do it." I finally replied.

"But, why not?"

"Do you know how bad that would be if we dated and we didn't even like each other?" I snapped.

"Yeah, but there's this thing called 'pretending'. A lot of celebrities do it," I made a face at her comment. I might not like Temari, or any celebrity for that matter, but I wasn't going to pretend with her. If I wanted a relationship I wouldn't pretend anything, fake or not.

"That's still bad, what if someone found out?"

"Not if you're a good pretender."

"Ugh, but still, Hatsu, that's not good at all. I'd feel guilty."

"This is why you're single."

"And this is why you have no friends," I retorted while Hatsune stuck her tongue out at me. God, and this girl is sixteen? I sighed loudly and reached for my pack of cigarettes. I pulled one out and lit it, lifting it to my lips and taking a long drag.

"Ew, that's gross," Hatsune screeched, making a face of disgust.

"Says the girl who's smoked weed," I countered. Hatsune narrowed her eyes at me, knowing I had made a point. Pot was gross and so were cigarettes but I liked the smell of cigarettes better. I wouldn't argue about which were better or worse for you with Hatsune so I'm just not going to bring it up around her.

"Dinner's ready!" I heard my mom yell, knocking on the door. I puffed out the smoke I held in my mouth and crushed the cigarette into the ash tray. "Coming," I called upstairs as I pulled off my sweatshirt and threw it onto my bed.

Hatsune and I climbed the stairs to the narrow hallway where the delicious smell of food permeated through the house. Already feeling my mouth water, I walked a little bit faster down the hallway and saw the dinner table filled with hand cooked meals from my mother. Taking my seat, with Hatsune beside me, we waited for my mom and dad to take their seats so we could begin eating.

After being seated we all began eating in silence like we usually did and that's when Hatsune decided to open her big fat mouth. "So, did you guys know Shikamaru has a girlfriend?" she announced at the dinner table, food spilling out of her mouth. I choked and my mom set down her utensils. My dad looked at me with a look of congratulations and everything was quiet.

"Oh... well then," my mom finally said after a few minutes of silence. I groaned. Why did she have to say that?

"Mom, listen,"

"No, no, it's okay dear, I'm fine,"

"No but mom –"

"Shikamaru, it's okay!"

"But –"

"Listen to your mother, Shikamaru! And to think I was starting to believe you were gay..."

"You thought I was gay? But what's wrong with gay people dad?"

Oh God, here we go.

"Nothing's wrong with gay people, it's just that you've never had a girlfriend and Chouji's been coming over a lot –"

"But Chouji has a girlfriend,"

"But what I'm saying, son, is that you don't... well I mean you didn't,"

"I don't have a girlfriend though,"

"It's okay, you don't have to be in denial about her. What's her name?" My dad asked, giving me his fatherly smile. I groaned again.

"You're all troublesome," I muttered.

"Her name's Temari," Hatsune graciously answered. I shot her a death glare. 'I'm going to kill you' I mouthed at her. That's when my parents dropped everything.

"TEMARI?" they both yelled. Oh fucking _shit. _Not only do my parents now believe I have a girlfriend, but they think it's Temari. They're starting to sound like Chouji. Ugh.

"Listen –"

"Oh my god, this is amazing my son is dating someone famous!"

Can I kill myself now or?

"Mom, Dad, can you guys listen for a second –"

"Let's hurry up and meet her already Shikamaru!"

"This means I can finally quit my job!"

"I'm not dating Temari!" I finally yelled, a new silence erupting throughout the house. Man, did I hate letting my parents done but it was better than lying to them. They all stared at me for a while until my dad sighed.

"Are you sure?" I rolled my eyes at this.

"Yeah, sorry to let you guys down but I don't even like her. I'm finished," I said as I pushed off from the table and headed down the hall. Sighing as loudly as possible, I opened my bedroom door and went down the stairs where the smell of cigarettes and dirty clothes surrounded me. I didn't want to be bothered right now. Meeting Temari was a horrible mistake and I can already tell my life is spiraling out of control because of her. It might not be evident now but I can _see _it coming.

Making a face, I picked up my pack of smokes and pulled a cigarette out. Doing the usual routine, I sat down on my bed and watched the room grow cloudy with hoards of smoke that escaped from my lips.

Temari was horribly troublesome. I hope she'll leave me alone, I don't want to be affiliated with her. She's just going to cause more trouble for me.

* * *

I wasn't really sure what happened after I put out my cigarette last night but I think I blacked out. Next thing I knew was the alarm going off. Well fuck. That meant school. Ugh. Throwing the heavy blanket off of my body, I ruffled my hair and sluggishly made my way to my bathroom. I got ready in about ten minutes, pulling a hat over my ears I grabbed my things and headed up the stairs.

Hatsune was at the end of the hall by the time I made it there with that stupid grin across her face. "What," I demanded more than asked. Oh God, don't tell me she's –

"Your mom said I could go to school with you!" she announced breezily. I made a face of disgust and sighed. Why. Hatsune grinned and handed me the papers that were mandatory for somebody visiting the school and I sighed again.

"You're troublesome," I muttered, grabbing my car keys. There wouldn't be any fighting it, I already knew that. "Bye, dear, have fun today Hatsune!" my mother called behind me as I closed the front door. Slipping my fingers through my "hobo" gloves as Naruto liked to call them, I reached for my pack of cigarettes and plucked from that sat snug between its neighbors.

Hatsune and I entered my car that smelled of stale smoke and sweaty guys, I saw out of the corner of my eye Hatsu crinkle her nose. I ignited the end of my guilty pleasure and shoved the key into the ignition of my old car.

We got to school and went through the usual deal whenever Hastune stopped by Konoha High. The day was a drag and obviously troublesome, until lunch. The gang and I sat in our usual corner near the exit of the lunchroom and passed around what everybody had to offer. That was when the main lunchroom doors crashed open and it was almost near silent. Somebody had got and let out a blood curdling scream like bloody murder.

Then that's when I felt like my life was crumbling apart.

* * *

**AN: **Hi, I'm back :D i apologize for the long wait but I'll be back in business now! Please review, I love your feedback c:


	9. Give a Damn

**Give a Damn **

_A Rocket to the Moon_

_If I owned Naruto, Shikamaru and Temari would've kissed. _

* * *

"What the fuck," I mutter under my breath until Hatsune is the next one to scream. All heads turned to the main doors simultaneously and that's when all color from my face drained. It was _Temari!_ You must be fucking kidding me. Hatsune tried to stand up and wave for her attention but I pulled her down.

"What the hell! That's Temari!" she screeched at me. I narrowed my eyes irritably.

"I don't want her to see me!" I hissed at my cousin, shoving her under the table. Spinning around immediately, I noticed the eerie silence. It was like a zombie movie or something, I swear. Everyone watched Temari cautiously, eyes trying not to pop out of their sockets. I motioned for Naruto to switch seats with me since I didn't want the singing witch to see me. I pulled my hood up close by my face and tried to look inconspicuous.

"Does anyone know where Shikamaru is?" Temari called finally and that's literally when I thought my heart stopped beating. Goddamn it what did this woman want? I heard a bunch of people gasp and Naruto nudged me. "Dude, what does she want?" I peered out to him and glared. "The fuck am I supposed to know?" I hissed at him. I looked across the table and squinted my eyes at Chouji, "Remember when I said that the day Ino threw up all over me after going on that ride was the worst day of my life?" he nodded, "I lied; this has to be the worst day of my life,"

I sighed rather audibly, looking around to see that Temari was still looking around the stupid cafeteria in search of me. Why did she want to see me anyways? Wasn't she supposed to be a super famous superstar or something? "Shikamaru, I know you're in here. Just hurry up and show yourself, I have some important things to do," Temari hollered again. I scowled, pulling the hood farther up over my face. I was legitimately surprised that neither Sakura or Ino started yelling Temari over. It was probably because they have VIP access to seeing Temari via me. Or it could be because they're too awestruck that Temari actually graced our school with her presence. I hated it either one it was.

Somebody across the table kicked me and when I looked up I was surprised to see it was Neji. "You should just go see what she wants. She said she had something important to get to," he told me in his wise-Neji voice. I rolled my eyes, "Please, if she wanted something she should've texted me earlier," Sakura and Ino whined at this comment, prodding me to give them her number. He stared at me with blank eyes for a few seconds before I finally gave it. There's something really creepy about Neji that'll make you do whatever he suggests. I think it has to do with his face and eyes.

"Fine, fine. I'll go see what the witch wants. It'll be troublesome, but I'm just doing it to get her out of my hair, you hear?" I told them carefully not to let them suspect Neji coerced me into doing it. I blew some stray hairs out of my face before throwing the hood off my hair and standing up with my hands in my pockets. "Over here," I called to her. There was another round of unnecessary dramatic gasps as Temari turned around and looked at me. She smiled in my direction and I kind of felt scared. Not that I was scared of her, but scared of what was happening inside me. I ignored it – kind of like I ignore everything else that could potentially be a threat to my well-being or if it required strength to think about it – and nodded my head over to the cafeteria's exit. "Let's talk over there," I told her and she agreed with a single nod. More gasps and I was sure one was from Sakura and Ino.

When I met Temari at the edge of the cafeteria, I glared silently at her. She seemed to have picked it up right away, "What's wrong? Why the mean face?" the witch teased. I scowled, letting a deep sigh escape through my nose.

"What are you here for? If you haven't noticed, everyone around here stopped breathing. Couldn't you have texted me or something?" I asked a bit coldly.

"Remember when I said I'd get your friends discount to the next show?" she asked, completely avoiding my question. I frowned at her.

"Yeah, why?"

"Well, Gaara and I pulled some strings and we got free tickets for your... little gang," Temari informed me.

"Wow, isn't that a dandy. I thought I made it clear that I'm not a fan of your music,"

"Ouch, that one hurt," she replied sarcastically.

"Couldn't you ask one of them to get it instead of me?" Temari waved her hand at me.

"You're the one I trust with free tickets to my concert. Besides, I don't know any of your friends," she stated as a matter-of-fact.

"We haven't even known each other for a good week and you trust me already? I feel so special,"

"Trying to work your way up the ladder to be my boyfriend aren't you, lover boy?" she countered with a smirk. I choked on whatever bile that had risen in my throat.

"That wasn't me texting you, I swear. It was my crazy cousin from out of town," I said, trying to conceal the panic in my voice. I just want to make it clear that I'm not afraid that Temari believes I want to date her. It's that news that I'm afraid of spreading around. I don't like her, and I'd like to make that clear to everyone.

"Oh, so that was your cousin? I could get her a free ticket too," Temari offered. I scoffed at that.

"I'll just give her my ticket because I'm not going. I'd rather stay at home and smoke until my lungs turn black," Temari feigned a hurt look and pressed her hand against her chest.

"That one hurt, hurt me right here," she patted her heart. I rolled my eyes; this women was so troublesome. Temari waved her hand behind her and a handful of tickets appeared. I could hear the people whispering around us. God, now how am I supposed to explain to the entire first lunch that I'm just... _acquainted _– I wouldn't dare say that she was my friend and our relationship is strictly platonic for that matter – with the teen pop sensation Temari.

She shoved the tickets into my arms and I counted enough for all of us plus Hatsune. I pulled one ticket out and handed it back to her, "I told you I'm not going," Temari smiled again and gently passed it back.

"That's for if you change your mind," she told me. I sighed and took it again, stuffing the pieces of paper into my pocket. Temari turned around to leave but swiveled around to face me once more.

"Oh, and I came here because I have to get to a meeting at three and a press conference at five on the other side of town; so there wouldn't be a way to come see you after school," she answered referring to my question from minutes ago. I quirked an eyebrow at her and almost smiled (don't worry I stopped myself before showing her that I found her attentiveness quite amusing) but restrained myself.

"Good to know," I replied. She grinned and headed off again and by the time she was halfway through the door I called her back. Temari stopped and looked over her shoulder.

"I'm not going, what should I do with this useless ticket?" I asked.

"You're not very smart aren't you?" Understatement, I have the highest grade in my class. "Give it away to a real fan," she stated and was off. I stared at the trail of dust she left and as soon as she was out the door the entire cafeteria was howling. Avoiding all questions directed towards me, I headed back to the table and held out the tickets. I could already hear Sakura and Ino drooling and I wasn't even looking at them.

"Shika, we love you _so _much. We'll do anything you want for getting us free tickets, oh my gosh, free tickets to Temari's show!" Sakura and Ino both yelled. I was actually surprised because Neji and Tenten looked pretty stoked because of free tickets. My mind wandered back to what the two babbling idiots I called friends said; '_We'll do anything you want..._' I smirked at my own intellect and pulled the tickets back.

"I want you guys to tell the entire first lunch that there's nothing going on between Temari and I. I got the tickets out of pure luck, okay? Don't tell them that Temari and I are acquainted with each other. It'll just make things so much more troublesome than they already are," Sakura and Ino frowned but agreed nonetheless. "We'll help them out too!" Naruto howled with his arm around Hinata's neck.

"It's the least we could do for getting free tickets to a sold out show," Tenten added. Sold out? Wow, Temari actually went out of her way to do that for _me_? I might have felt special for a second. Either way, I'm still not going to the stupid concert. It was a waste of time. I guess I'll have to find some idiot to take my spot.

Hatsune grabbed my sleeve and sniffled at me. "Shika, is there a ticket for me too?" she asked with tears in her eyes. I rolled mine and swiped one out. "You should be grateful; Temari knows of your being," she jumped up and grabbed me by my neck giving me a choking hug. "You're the best cousin ever!" she yelled as we left the cafeteria.

"Yeah, I'm aware of that," I replied. I glanced at the ticket seeing that it was next Saturday. That's a pretty long time to find someone; maybe I could start looking after school.

* * *

**AN: **Wow remember when I said I was back in business LMAO but yeah here's an update on what's happening. When I said this story was coming along slowly, I wasn't kidding. There are a lot of bugs still in the plot I've got so far and how the beginning of this story I've laid down isn't very supporting so a lot of the filling parts will happen soon. This is just the beginning. Anyways, I hope everyone had an eventful summer! :D The next update should be pretty soon since I've written it out in my head so keep your eyes peeled


End file.
